Nothing like a quick dance to get the show started. During the monologue, Dave does a bit of the two-step to the delight of the audience. Something was said during the pre-show Q&A that triggered Dave's samba. Unfortunately I missed the pre-show. I need to start getting to work on time. Dave did another dance number at the end of the monologue.

It's America's fastest growing party sensation, it's AUDIENCE SHOW AND TELL
A&S#1: Jim Ferazzi, a works for a rental agency for apartment hunters and lives in nearby Hoboken, New Jersey.
What does Jim have to show or tell? Jim was an extra in the film "A Beautiful Mind" with Russell Crowe. We see a clip of Mr. Crowe with his beautiful mind outdoors on campus. In the background we see Mr. Ferazzi getting himself a glass of punch. Fine fine work by Jim.

A&S#2: Bergen Wheeler, a dancer from Durham, North Carolina, now living in New York. We learn Durham is known as the City of Medicine. Why? Bergen is not sure. Bergen dances with the Alvin Ailey company, one of the world's finest. What does Bergen have to show or tell? Bergen can walk on her hands up to someone, wrap her legs around their waist, and pull herself up. Dave quickly volunteers to be the guy.
Dave takes off his jacket and stands in the aisle with arms raised. Behind him, Beth does a handstand and "walks" towards Dave. She wraps her legs around Dave's waist and then pulls herself up into a piggyback position on the host. The host is quite satisfied with this trick.
I wasn't interested in seeing a replay of the stunt. What I wanted was a replay of Bergen telling us what she's going to do.

A&S#3: Christine Tollison of the United States Army Reserve, from Spring Lake Park, Minnesota. This isn't the first time Christine has met Dave. Dave, Paul, and Biff met Christine when they went to Iraq during the Christmas holiday to entertain the troops. Christine has some photos to share. But that's not all. While in Iraq, Christine sang for the troops accompanied by Paul. Paul lauded Christine's performance at the time, a splendid rendition without rehearsal. The song? "Let's Hear It For The Boy." And tonight, Christine performs the song once again. Nicely done, Christine.

Monty comes down to offer Christine her prizes. Before departing, Dave asks, "Vicky, why is it that people enjoy the taste of Explod-O-Pop popcorn so much?" Answers Monty/Vicky: "That's an easy one, Mr. Carney. It's contaminated with flavor. And it's carbolicious! Mmm."
Dave thanks Vicky/Monty.
Monty/Vicky responds, "Thank YOU, Mr. Craney."
Then she exits.

And that was Audience Show and Tell.

Darn. On Dave's blue card regarding Christine was that she is an E-4 Specialist from Minnesota. I had a joke all set up ready to go. Are you ready?
"The New York Yankees once had an E-4 specialist from Minnesota: Chuck Knoblauch." Bah dum bum."

Back from commercial, we see the woman crawling up Dave's back from Audience Show and Tell.

And during the Audience Show and Tell, back in the shack we were quickly putting together some facts about Durham, North Carolina.
-Since 1981, Durham, North Carolina has called itself the "City of Medicine, USA"
-1 out of 3 people living in Durham are employed in the field of health services.
-The population of Durham is 190,000.
-Durham is the home of the Duke Blue Devils.
-And our own Biff Henderson is from Durham, North Carolina.

Dave calls Biff out to take a bow. He then invites him over with, "Come on over here and climb up daddy's back." Not hearing him right, Biff comes over to Dave to get a better listen. Dave fears that Biff is actually going to climb up his back. Dave quickly takes back what he said. There is no further climbing tonight.

This is quickly becoming a Late Show highlight and favorite. It's the SOAP OPERA CLIP OF THE NIGHT - from NBC's "Passions" - it's on in New York at 2:00 PM. I gotta check this out. It's a clip of an older woman in desperation. She is deeply troubled and in tears. She says aloud that someone is about to become "dead meat." Cut to a monkey sitting on a sofa. The monkey covers its eyes in fear. This show is on NBC during the day. It is not in Spanish.

Another show Dave can't get enough of is the new "Blind Justice," also on NBC. . . . or maybe ABC. It's about a detective who was blinded while performing his police duties. Instead of retiring and receiving a well-deserved pension, Detective Dunbar continues to work for the Department even though he is blind. We see a scene from last week's episode. It's Detective Dunbar walking a perp in handcuffs down the block. The camera widens to reveal he has arrested a floor lamp.
I laughed at the unexpected "Be There" and the misguided "point" at the end.

TOP TEN: Signs You're Not Getting Enough Sleep - A study by the National Sleep Foundation found that most Americans do not get the recommended 7 to 9 hours of sleep a night. The lack of sleep adversely affects their quality of work, driving safety, and sex life. Dave says Americans are averaging 34 minutes of sleep a night. He says, "They are sleep depraved . . . . I mean, sleep deprived." Paul and Dave laugh at the misspeak that made sense.
#9. Can't even stay awake for the two minutes it takes to have sex.
#7. When asked to describe you, most people say "lethargic sumbitch."
#2. Duties as President limit you to a mere 11 hours a night.

DENZEL WASHINGTON: He's Brutus in Broadway's "Julius Caesar." It's in previews now at the Belasco Theater at 111 West 44th Street here in Manhattan. How's the family? His one daughter is in Copenhagen singing her heart out with a choral group. His son John David plays football for a college in Atlanta with hopes of being a professional. He has also expressed an interest in acting. In either profession, a young man will get beaten up pretty badly.

Dave has a photo of Denzel as Brutus in "Julius Caesar" but first shows another photo from Denzel's early days. Denzel is delighted to see a photo of himself in his very first play at Fordham University here in New York, "The Emperor Jones." The second photo is Denzel in current Army fatigues as Brutus. Denzel may have mentioned it before but seeing the photo makes you realize that the production of "Julius Caesar is performed in contemporary attire, with the actual dialogue of the original.
Denzel has done Shakespeare in the past, including "Coriolanus" at Shakespeare in the Park here in the city way back in the 1970s. He performed with Morgan Freeman which involved a sword fight. It was supposed to be three clanks of the swords then a stab by Morgan, but Denzel had "ideas" for something more elaborate. Morgan piped, "Look, three blows and you're out of here. I stab you and that's it."

Denzel has also taken an interest in sailing. He knows how to pull ropes and stuff but that's about it. Dave says he received his sailing license years ago off City Island in the Bronx, thinking it would be something he would like to do. Once he got his license, he never went again. It really doesn't matter, though; I think Dave got it just to pretty up his resume.
Dave asks Denzel how he keeps in such good shape. Denzel says he drinks a lot of water and does a little bit of exercise. Dave's eyes widen, as did mine, thinking all it takes to look like Denzel is to drink a lot of water! Dave questions him on that and Denzel laughs, admitting he was just trying to think of something to say. Who knows if drinking water has anything to do with it? Dave doesn't care. Dave puts in an order for more water and plans to throw out his Bo-Flex.
Dave finishes up by telling Denzel, "I'll be coming to your show and I'm bringing my cell phone."

ACT 5: If you're going to be in the Los Angeles area and would like tickets to "Let's Make a Deal," send a self-addressed stamped envelope to:
Let's Make a Deal
4151 Prospect Avenue
Hollywood, California
90027
Wear your best costume and maybe Monty Hall will pick you!
But don't get stuck with a Zonk!
We'll be right back.

FAITH EVANS: She's a Grammy Award winner whose new CD will be in stores on Tuesday. The CD, "The First Lady." The song, "Again."

And that was our show for Thursday, March 31, 2005. Wahoo EXTRA!

Here's a brain-twister about "Let's Make a Deal" that I'll try to explain. At the end of the show, two of the biggest winners of the day were chosen to trade in their winnings for a chance at the big prize. The two contestants would have 3 curtains to choose from. Let's say Person 1 picked Curtain A. Person 2 picked Curtain B.
Obviously, each curtain had a 33% chance of being the big prize and it's important to realize that Monty Hall knew which curtain it was. Wanting to keep the reveal of the big prize for the show's final moment, Monty would first show the losing curtain picked by one of the contestants. Let's pretend Person 2 who picked Curtain B was a loser. Monty calls for Curtain 2 to be opened, which contains a toaster or a goat or something like that.
Now onto contestant #1 who picked Curtain A. Monty would offer this contestant the chance to change his pick to Curtain C. Should the contestant switch his pick from Curtain A to Curtain C? YES!!! Absolutely. Can you tell me why?

Did you know that Brutus is his last name? It is actually, Marcus Brutus.

It looks like the New York Jets football team has received the "go ahead" to build a stadium on the congested west side of Manhattan. This is happy news for the team's owner, some real estate agents, construction contractors . . . . and no one else. The fans and those living in the area certainly don't want it. It's been a very contentious ride up to this point in the Jets venture to secure this location. Me, I think the area is too valuable to be wasted on a sports stadium. There are many better ways to "revitalize" an area in Manhattan . . . . MANHATTAN! . . . . than to build a sports stadium that will be used 8 times a year. Mayor Bloomberg wants it and has been pushing hard for it. Most living here do not, which makes everyone wonder who the Mayor is supposed to represent. Originally, the New York Jets were to buy the location for about $100 million. The Mayor was quick to jump on that bandwagon. Then some events took place that raised the price. I was going to do some investigating on the matter but I had an Easter Egg Hunt to organize last week and never got around to it. New York Daily News writer Mike Lupica beat me to it, thinking the same thing I was.

From Lupica's Sunday column:

"First the Jets wanted to pay the somewhat less than kingly sum of $100 million for those railyards on the West Side. That's when Mayor Bloomberg, who is supposed to be the mayor of everybody, wanted them to have no competition. Then Kalikow of the MTA, trying to act tougher than a cop on the beat, said, oh no, they had to raise their bid to $300 million. Only now Cablevision has bid nearly $800 million for the land, and guess what? If that's the best offer on the table and Kalikow doesn't take it - at a time when the MTA has to keep raising fares - then somebody, in the immortal political words of Ricky Ricardo, is going to have some 'splainin' to do. This isn't about what you think of the Dolans or Cablevision. This is about what is supposed to be an open bidding process, even if it didn't actually become an open bidding process until around the bottom of the eighth inning. And, oh by the way, the idea that the economic future of this city hinges on either the 2010 Super Bowl or the 2012 Olympics is just more smoke and mirrors from a rich mayor taking care of a rich owner and rich developers. Nothing more, nothing less."

And here's hoping for a huge rain storm Sunday night for baseball's opening day at Yankee Stadium, followed by a beautiful sunny Monday afternoon.

THIS DATE IN NHL HOCKEY HISTORY
March 31, 1973 - The Philadelphia Flyers score 8 goals in 1 period vs. the New York Islanders on 60 shots on goal.
And on March 31, 1928 in Floral, Saskatchewan, Gordie Howe was born

So should the remaining Let's Make a Deal person switch his pick from Curtain A to Curtain C? Yes. Here's why. When contestant #1 picked Curtain A, he had a 33% chance of being right. He also had a 66% chance of being wrong. Monty Hall knows which of the 3 curtains contains the big prize, therefore he reveals one of the losing curtains first, in this case Curtain B picked by contestant #2. The first curtain revealed during the final showcase on Let's Make a Deal is always a loser. It's a given. But the chance of the remaining contestant having chosen the winning curtain remains the same: 33% chance of being right; 66% chance of being wrong. It is not 50-50 at this point. It's still 33% vs. 66%. Why? Because Monty knows which is the winning curtain, and he purposely reveals one of the losing curtains first. The fact that he knows which is the winning curtain eliminates the randomness involved. Curtain A has a 33% chance of being the winning curtain. Curtain C now has a 66% chance of being the winning curtain, after Curtain B has been eliminated. When given the option to switch curtains, the remaining contestant should ALWAYS switch.

Did all that make any sense? Helen Read, did I explain this OK?

Sure, the Wahoo Gazette has lots of mistakes. But I'm over 40. The Supreme Court says you can't touch me.